Whew, what a title! That about wore me out! But I gotta be honest, I gotta write about this!
Why do we sneak around and be bad? Shame, embarrassment, or because if no one sees us it didn't really happen. Or maybe it happened but I don't have to be accountable for it? I have never been a big sneaker of food. I have on occasion waited until my husband was in bed to make popcorn, but that's mostly because I don't like to share it with begging dogs that look at me sad eyes. Of course Cooper, the big, little yorkie, hears me and comes running in to see what's up, most of the time.
But I do think there is some disconnect that if I am alone, I don't have to feel accountable for that food cheat. I bought a little bag of potato chips at Walmart yesterday and ate them on the way home. I knew my husband wouldn't give two rips if I ate chips or not - he never pressures me or makes comments and thank God he doesn't or I would probably smack him into next week.
I don't think it is ever good to make comments about other people's habits. If you are concerned about my health, we sit down and have a one on one about being healthy and everyone puts their cards on the table and takes their lumps. But I couldn't stand to live with a man who made snide comments or judgmental overtures. Everyone takes care of their own stuff, that's how I live, I move on...God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. I believe in unconditional love, minus judgment and keeping your side of the street clean and letting the other guy do the same. Most of us are doing the best we can with the tools we have. Criticism, even that constructive stuff, can really wreck a bunch of tools!
Anyway, it just seems that there is a disconnect when we do things and think no one sees or knows. It may be real enough to me that I just ate that whole enchilada when half would have been enough, but its not as real as it would be if I were dining with some of you guys!
I am only writing this as a cautionary tale, not because I am feeling guilty for a three day binge. I know where my week spots are and staying honest with myself is one of them. I just want to keep driving that point home because I think it is so important to my success. I think it was those little inconsistencies that kept me down for so long. Those little cheats all adding up and I wasn't cheating anyone but myself! I don't wanna cheat me anymore! I really wanna be honest!
I am going to eat an occasional little bag of chips but I am going to be honest that I ate them. Not with my husband, he is not the food police, but with me. Then I am going to make the adjustment and move on. I am not here to beat myself up or try to be perfect! Forget perfect! Its unobtainable and if you think you are perfect, ha, have I got news for you! ;)
I think its pretty clear that a tree makes a sound whether we are there to hear it or not just like a load of junk food has the same effect on my body whether I'm alone or in a crowd. The point I have to remember is to keep on being real. Being true. Being honest with me. One felled tree doesn't ruin the whole forest and neither does one bag of chips a junk food junkie make...just don't start lining up a bunch of lumberjacks with chainsaws and everything is going to be okay...watch out!
That's all ~ Thanks y'all!!