>>> just don't laugh until you cry.
I am realizing today that I have been living in fear. Even though I was saying I was doing this my way, I was in fear and denial about being in fear. i was so afraid I was going back to the old me.
After last weeks disastrous feelings, thoughts and actions and yesterday's post, I pulled myself up today, with the help of some friends, and I had a good breakfast. I made a cabbage dish for lunch at 5:30 a.m. and came home and made some veggie dishes to go with dinner and will be taking leftovers tomorrow for lunch.
I realized tonight, I am just trying tooo hard to keep it all perfect, why? Because if I am not perfect in this I might gain a pound or two back and then a pound or two more then say screw it all and fall into a tub of ice cream with Carmel sauce...
But living in fear of not being perfect and fear of going back to the old ways is a stupid way to live my life today. And the mystery of whether or not I can be perfect has already been answered, I can't - only one perfect and He was half God. No mystery there - I don't get to be perfect - oh but I do try....
So back to the Serenity Pray and the things I learned from Al Anon and the things my precious daughter learned in AA and passed along to me because she knows how much I love little kernels of wisdom.
God (pray along if you want) grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
And from my precious Ashley - Do the next right thing. (That's all?) Yep just do the next right thing.
So for today, live in today, don't fret and fear tomorrow...just do the best you can today...that's all!
Thanks Ya'll
Special SHOUT OUT to Jackie who's precious words helped me come back to my senses! Cyber Hugs!!!!
I love that timeless prayer. I am glad you are feeling in control again. Just keep pushing through the fear. Everyone, EVERYONE, has fear.. none are fearless - it's just a matter of pushing through it. ;)
ReplyDelete"Do the next right thing...." I love this thought. It chunks life down into small manageable moments, which is sometimes all I can handle! Small and manageable. Even eating healthy for one whole day can be overwhelming to me at times. The serenity prayer is always comforting, too. I'm glad you're feeling better and glad you shared your struggle. I grew strength from you - and from knowing I'm not alone with my challenges. Thanks for the shout-out. That was very sweet - though the real strength came from you. Hugs, my friend. Jackie
ReplyDeleteI know how feeling like its all one big struggle feels too and getting it down in your blog also means letting go of it....this is how i feel today...and its out there! Tomorrow is a whole new day and one quote, one thought one kind word can pick your heart up and help you to have a good day. Lovely friends helping you understand where you're going is so helpful. I love this blogworld - we are so lucky to have it. Stay strong and be kind to yourself xx
ReplyDeleteDawn
I read the Serenity Prayer along with you.
ReplyDeleteFor me....I know the things I have to change. Sometimes I just do the opposite anyway. Then I get so pissed at myself.
Uh-oh. It looks like I've missed a lot. It also sounds like you're pulling it together. Weight loss is hard. It involves so many aspects of our lives.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to refollow you. My computer hasn't crashed for a month. I'll refollow and see how it goes. I'm certainly hopin gfor the best!
hang in there.
Deb